According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, in the United States, a woman is assaulted or beaten every nine seconds.
One in three women (and one in four men) has been a victim of intimate partner violence, the same report shows.
Carleigh Hager is one of these women.
Carleigh, a vibrant and cheerful 25-year-old woman living in Indianapolis, Indiana, never thought she would have to fear for her life.
But on the evening of October 22, 2016, she returned home from a wedding with her boyfriend and three other guests.
What had begun as a perfect evening quickly turned into a terrible tragedy.
Warning: This article contains disturbing images.
Initially, everything seemed festive and fun, with cheerful faces returning from the wedding.
But Carleigh’s boyfriend, Ryan, was also very drunk and started behaving increasingly aggressively towards her. (In 45% of cases where women were abused, the perpetrator was under the influence of alcohol or drugs.)
He began insulting Carleigh in front of his friends and suggested raping her together with all of them.
Carleigh was both scared and sad. She decided to leave the group of boys alone and went to bed.
She hoped the situation would blow over if she walked away.
Unfortunately, she was wrong. Her boyfriend entered the bedroom while she was sleeping and began seriously assaulting her.
Ryan’s friends quickly tried to stop him and it briefly stopped. But Ryan kicked the boys out of the house and locked the door.
Fortunately, the boys did not hesitate to do the right thing and call emergency services.
But as the police rushed to the house, Ryan continued to attack Carleigh. He threw her to the ground and began biting her.
Carleigh desperately tried to fight back and escape, but Ryan held her in a terrible chokehold.
The police arrived just in time and likely prevented Ryan from killing Carleigh.
They found Carleigh covered in blood and in shock. She was immediately taken to the hospital.
She had several wounds on her body and face. Ryan had even tried to rip out her tongue.
Fortunately, the doctors were able to save the young woman, but it took three weeks for her to recover enough to start eating again.
And the mental wounds? They take much longer to heal.
Carleigh admitted she had been living in fear with her boyfriend for a long time.
But on social media, she always portrayed herself as happy with Ryan. No one knew how toxic the relationship between the two really was.
Now, Carleigh warns others not to make the same mistakes.
“You have to tell someone, you can’t be ashamed,” she says. “You can’t be ashamed. You have to tell someone, because I almost died, and it can happen.”
Ryan, who admitted to the abuse, is currently in prison awaiting his sentence.
Carleigh and her family hope that the court does the right thing and gives Ryan a long prison sentence.
Her family has started a crowdfunding on GoFundMe and hopes to raise enough money to pay for the plastic surgery Carleigh needs.
Carleigh’s mother says she never saw any signs. This shows how difficult recognizing domestic violence is when it occurs.
Carleigh’s mother now hopes that the scars will not define her daughter in the future.
“She is so beautiful, inside and out,” says mother Amy Ballard. “Her strength and beauty are on the inside, and the scars will heal, and with time, so will her heart.”
Many thanks to the boys who called the police – without them, Carleigh might not have survived!
Unfortunately, many other women are victims of male violence daily.
Hopefully, Carleigh’s story can inspire others in a bad relationship to seek help before it’s too late. Please share!
